Friday, July 18, 2014


Meet TAKE THE LONG WAY HOME, newly under contract with Loose Id! This one has a very frenetic--but I hope fun--narrator. He's only eighteen, but he's got a lot of opinions. And at least ninety-nine problems. The farmer's market is one. School is another. His perpetually-screaming family. His internet friend, Evan. His sister's mafia dollhouse. The random guy online who wants to pee on him. The subversive characters from his Spanish workbook. And this:

Here's the working blurb:

Dresden Marich has failed out of high school three months shy of graduation. He’s infatuated with his online friend, Evan, alienated from his family and former classmates, and still trying to recover from his father’s death six years ago. He’s also keeping a troubling secret about his older brother, Gunner, who is currently away at boot camp.

Then Dresden meets Caleb, a judgmental environmentalist who’s hardly Dresden’s fantasy come true. But Caleb seems to understand Dresden’s desire for rough sex, big feelings, and, ultimately, safety. As Dresden becomes embroiled in a farmers market drama involving Caleb, a couple of bullying tomato enthusiasts, and a gang of vigilante vegans, he discovers he might be willing to trade a fantasy relationship with Evan for a shot at something real with Caleb.

But Dresden fears telling quick-to-judge Caleb his secret, and the news that Gunner is coming home sends him fleeing to California for a chance to meet Evan in person and hopefully fall in love. When the meeting doesn’t go as expected, Dresden faces a choice: stay in California and carve out a new life, or take the long road home to his family, Caleb, and a past he must face if he has any hope for a future.

In other news, BRAT-TISTIC, the omnibus paperback of the WACKY WEDNESDAY and THE BRAT-TASTIC JAYK PARKER, is now available. So if you've been saying to yourself lately, "Man, I'd really like to read two books about domestic discipline bound together in one convenient tome, but I'd also like them to feature body swapping and a cake that tastes like butt cum," look no further. I've got you. 


  1. I love all your crazy narrators, but this particular couple is messing with the structural integrity of my heart. Can't wait.